Repurposing this blog

As a former (?) over-achiever, I tend to want a lot, to do the most with my time, to constantly be learning, working on or producing something.

For a time that meant keeping a blog, my personal Instagram account, a graphic design Instagram account, and even a street photography Instagram account that went quiet within a month or two (I guess that also points to my impulsiveness which I’m trying to curb).

This year, upon moving to the UK, I wanted to document my time abroad, to have something to look back upon, or to drive me to be more conscious and thoughtful with my time and experiences. So I created this blog, created a daily life log on Twitter, tried real hard to be active on my private Instagram. I also continued my habit of journalling daily in a helpful and non-demanding app, Grid Diary, and tried to watch my diet and weight through calorie tracking via the FitnessPal app.

For a time it felt great! It felt I was finally doing what I think I should be doing—keeping on top of things, tracking my progress in life, work and hobbies, sharing my life with people who wanted to know more about my ‘exotic’ life.

But within months it felt tiring. I didn’t want to post as much anywhere because much of my life didn’t seem worthy of sharing or was simply mundane, repetitive or unadventurous. Work consumed me too.

Even when I had interesting days such as a weekend hike with Deon’s lab mates, or when we decided to tour Manchester by tram, I didn’t find enough energy to pour my excitement and stories in words. I recorded videos for reels, took a thousand and one photos, created half completed or sometimes even skeleton blog drafts, but never got around to finish them.

I knew this was becoming a problem. I sought for help and began working actively on rising above all that, so at the time posting more regularly didn’t feel like the most important thing to do. I wanted to prioritise my own mental health and wellbeing.

To preserve some sanity and relieve the pressure I feel in staying active on my various channels and journals, I’ve decided to relook into how I can sustainably maintain what I truly enjoy doing: writing, crochet, graphic design and photo/videography.

I’ve decided to ditch the feeble attempt at tweeting, to channel more personal happenings to Instagram, and focus on crochet for my blog. Although calorie counting has worked well for me, I’ve decided that the few months of using it to track eating habits have made a significant enough impact to now move on from it.

Frankly, it’s still a battle. I’m confronted by so many ideas, things I want to do that even if doubled the hours in my day, I’d not be able to explore all of them. I still want to try out having an ASMR channel (not to get views but so I can record the triggers that work for me and I can play them on repeat, yet help others if they too enjoy similar triggers), to have a crocheting channel, maybe a charity/business, and do more creative work, perhaps full-time as a freelancer. Even in the crafts/crochet sphere, I’m pulled in so many directions, yearning to pick up Tunisian crocheting, macrame, amigurumi designing, needle punching, embroidery and so, so much more!

But I think it’s time to slow down my pace, calibrate my aspirations so they don’t become another monster whose mouth I willingly jump into, only for it to chew me up and spit me out, all beaten up and too lethargic to carry on.

This update is rather timely given that May is the month of mental awareness. If you are following my humble blog, I hope the new direction will continue to be interesting to you. If not, feel no pressure to stay and you are free to walk away! Thanks for the support so far and I’m glad you stuck around. 🙂